Finding Peace in Divorce: How Buddha Drives Against Traffic
- Oscar
- Jun 22
- 6 min read
Updated: 6 days ago
Buddha drives against traffic. At first glance, that may sound strange. But haven't you felt that pull before? That deep-down instinct that says, "This can't be the only way," especially when the world shouts the opposite.
Modern man today starts from nothing, then puts the pedal down chasing name, fame, power, fortune, house, money, family, women even love, and truth. As a child, Buddha was a prince. He had it all.
Name. Fame. Palaces. Wealth. Children. The entire world bowed before him. And yet, in the middle of the night, he chose a different direction. He slipped away from the castle walls not out of abandonment, but in pursuit of something more real, more lasting. Love and truth.
He didn’t just leave his home. He left the highway of expectations. He drove against the traffic on a metaphorical one-hundred-lane highway where everyone else raced forward. Who was right, Buddha or us?
If you’re going through a divorce, a heartbreak, or any life quake you might feel this too. The pressure to keep it all together, to do what everyone else is doing, to act like everything’s okay.
But what if that direction is not meant for you? What if driving against the traffic is the most sane thing you can do right now?
Why Following the Crowd During Your Divorce May Be Making Things Worse
Divorce isn’t just messy, it’s loud.
Friends give advice you didn’t ask for. Your family tells you how they think you should behave. Social media hypes up being "strong" and "flawless" while you're quietly unraveling. Outside voices shout at you constantly, and you start to wonder am I doing this right?
Most people going through a divorce feel pressured to follow a formula: Get a lawyer. Fight for everything. Get over it quickly. Post a selfie where you look amazing and caption it with something like, “On the other side!”
But if that process doesn’t feel like your truth, it can backfire.
Maybe you’re heartbroken, but pretending you’re fine. Maybe you're rushing because others say you should be "over it" by now. Maybe you’re swallowing your pain, your doubts, your voice because you think being “agreeable” will make things easier.
Newsflash: It rarely does.
Performing your divorce instead of authentically living it comes at a huge emotional cost. People end up burned out, resentful, or second-guessing every decision. Some stay stuck for years because they made choices out of fear, not clarity.
And underneath it all? A subtle, dangerous idea: that silence equals strength.
But you don’t need to stuff down your truth just to avoid rocking the boat. Sometimes, rocking the boat is how you stop it from sinking.
So what’s really at stake here? Not just your legal agreements. We're talking about your emotional well-being, your children’s stability, and the foundation of your future peace of mind.
How “Buddha Drives Against Traffic” Explains Emotional Resistance in Divorce
Let’s go back to the phrase: Buddha drove against the traffic.
What does that mean, really? It means going against the grain of what society expects. It means listening to the still, small voice inside you when everything around you is loud and chaotic.
Divorce isn’t just the end of a relationship. It's the unraveling of identity, family expectations, and beliefs you didn’t even know you held. It shakes the walls of who you thought you were.
And in the middle of that storm, you will feel an urge to return to what’s familiar even if it hurts.
Why?
Because we’re wired to seek approval and belonging. Especially during emotional trauma. Which is why pushing against norms isn’t just hard it can feel nearly impossible.
You might avoid speaking up because you're scared of judgment. You might feel like a failure because somewhere deep inside, society taught you that broken marriages mean broken people.
Some of us grew up believing that voicing our needs meant we were selfish. Some got stuck in relationships where doubting yourself was normalized. Others feel they're only “good” if they people-please, stay small, or keep peace at any cost.
We internalize these patterns, carry them into adulthood, then wonder why we feel so off-balance.
Buddha left everything not because that was the easy path but because it was the true one. Imagine doing that in today’s world. Imagine telling your entire support system, “Actually, I'm not okay. And I’m going to handle this my way.”
It takes courage. But real growth starts when you stop trying to contort yourself into someone else’s idea of how you should heal.
Choosing Conscious Divorce: The Courage to Walk Your Own Path
So what’s the alternative?
You take a conscious approach. Meaning you pause. You reflect. You ask not, “What should I do?” but rather, “What do I need?”
That shift alone can change everything.
When you align your actions with your inner values even if those values aren’t popular you’ll notice something remarkable. Your mind calms down. Your heart stops racing. You breathe easier.
This doesn’t mean things get easy. It means you start to feel congruent. Like the inside of you is finally in agreement with the outside.
One powerful step? Take an intentional pause. Stop reacting, and start consciously responding. In that small space of stillness, your inner voice gets louder.
And you’re not meant to do this alone.
That’s where a divorce coach can be life-changing. A coach doesn’t tell you what to do. They provide a safe, nonjudgmental space. They help you untangle your authentic needs from outside expectations.
They offer real strategies. Whether you're in an uncontested divorce or navigating a high-conflict mess, they help you anchor to clarity, not chaos.
Want one truth to keep in your back pocket? You are allowed to question rules that no longer serve you.
And with the right support, you can take bold steps without losing who you are in the process.
Mike’s Moment of Clarity in the Middle of a Storm
Let me tell you about Mike.
He was knee-deep in a messy divorce that could only be described as a storm with teeth. His ex was controlling, and every conversation felt like combat.
Everyone around him said the same thing: “You need to hit back just as hard.” Lawyer up. Demand everything. Fight fire with fire.
But something inside him said…no.
He didn’t want to fight. That didn’t mean he was weak. It just wasn’t his way.
So he hired a divorce coach. In that calm space, a light bulb went off. He realized: Setting boundaries doesn’t mean being combative. Holding your ground can be quiet, clear, and firm.
Mike began speaking up, not to escalate, but to protect his peace.
He withdrew from unnecessary drama. He said no with grace. He stopped trying to be the hero or the villain. He just…came back to herself.
And you could see the change. No more frantic texts. No more sleepless nights. He was still in a tough process, but one he could withstand with calm, not chaos.
Mike is proof that peace isn't passive, it’s powerful.
Your Roadmap to Conscious Choice in a Chaotic Time
Ready to start walking your own path?
It doesn’t have to be big and dramatic. Begin where you are.
Pause and Reflect: Take 10 minutes each day to journal freely. No format, no judgment. Just get your thoughts onto paper. You’ll be surprised what rises up when you stop editing yourself.
Name Your Truth: Identify three values that matter most to you right now. Peace? Honesty? Stability? These will become your compass.
Set One Inner Boundary: What’s one thing you’ll no longer tolerate? Maybe it’s self-criticism. Maybe it's pretending everything’s fine when you’re struggling. Pick one. Honor it daily.
Seek the Right Support: You deserve guidance from someone who respects your timeline and your truth. Whether it’s a divorce coach or therapist, find someone who listens without fixing.
Redefine “Success”: Forget what Instagram or your mother-in-law thinks success looks like. Define your own version. Maybe it’s waking up without anxiety. Maybe it’s a peaceful co-parenting plan. Make it yours.
Begin Small: You don’t have to change your whole life today. Just do the next right thing. Then the next. Momentum follows intention.
Conclusion
When everything around you is chaotic, when the world says “Drive faster!” but your gut says “Hold on,” remember:
Buddha drove against the traffic.
And you can too.
Going against the norm isn’t rebellion for its own sake. It’s a return to truth.
You don’t owe anyone a polished performance of your pain. You don’t need to follow someone else’s path to healing. You just need the courage to stop, listen inside, and choose what’s true for you.
Trusting yourself, even when it’s uncomfortable, builds something unshakable: confidence, resilience, and peace.
So tie your shoes. Breathe deep. And if the road you're on doesn’t feel right, it’s okay to take the exit ramp even if no one else does.
The only path you need to follow…is your own.
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